Fic - Four Over-Protective Uncles, Two Weapon-Happy Aunts and Uncle Cougar's Big-Ass Sniper's Rifle

[merry_gentry]

Fic written for the_losers_2010 Inaugural Commentfic Party.

The Losers, gen
Prompt: Team, future!fic, Jensen's niece is going on her first real date







Bethany could quite cheerfully scream at her mom sometimes.

Like now, for example, when Bethany’s in her room, getting ready for her first proper date (Josh is taking her to a movie and dinner!) and her mom’s invited not just Uncle Jake but all of Bethany’s honorary ‘uncles’ and her two honorary ‘aunts’ over.

This, Bethany knows, is not going to end well.

She legs it for the stairs when she hears the doorbell – but she’s only fifteen and she was upstairs and Aunt Aisha’s quicker than Uncle Cougar when she wants to be. Josh is sixteen and nearly six foot already, towering over Aunt Aisha, but he already looks like he’s had the fear of God put into him (or, more likely, the fear of Aunt Aisha and the knife she’d just happened to be sharpening).

Bethany rolls her eyes and tries to push Josh out of the doorway so they can leave, nownownow, before…

…Before Uncle Jake and Uncle Frankie and Uncle Pooch come out of the sitting room. Bethany whimpers just a little as her Uncles corner Josh and Auntie Jolene and Bethany’s mom join Aunt Aisha by the still-open front door. Aunt Aisha tries to hand her sheathed knife to Bethany (and when Bethany refuses to take it, she tries to slip it into Bethany’s purse but the last thing this needs is Bethany arrested for carrying a concealed weapon). Auntie Jolene slips a small spray-can of mace into Bethany’s purse and…okay, fine. That can stay, although Bethany really doesn’t think she’ll be using it. Her mom’s smirking at her and the smirk widens into a full-on grin when Bethany glares back.

So not fair.

There’s muttered threats, promises of retribution if Bethany isn’t home by ten, if Bethany doesn’t have a good time, if Bethany has to pay…really, she loves her big, stupid family, she really does – just maybe not so much when she’s trying to have her first proper date ever.

Josh looks like he’s about to pee his pants when Bethany finally manages to get him out of the front door. She’s not going to fault him for it – her uncles are mad, like, crazy-mad, and the visible scars don’t help.

“Just…don’t look back,” she mutters after she’s glanced around just to check that none of them are following them already. He does, though, and gets a full-on view of Uncle Cougar attaching the sight to his scarily big sniper's rifle on the other side of the sitting room window. Josh freezes in place at that, and it takes Bethany tugging on his hand to get him moving again.

He calms down after that – once they’re well away from her house. He’s nice and sweet and he buys her a box of Whoppers when she’s not looking, blushing a little and telling her that her best friend Susie told him that they were her favourite. He holds her hand when the movie starts and doesn’t even try to put his arm around her…

Which turns out to probably be a good thing, ‘cause Bethany gets this feeling of being watched halfway through the movie and she looks around. There, five rows behind them, are Uncle Jake and Uncle Cougar, tossing candy at each other and arguing about something quietly. Uncle Cougs still has his hat on – although, really, when does he not? – and in the light from the screen he winks at her from under its brim.

Yeah, Bethany’s got a weird family, but she loves them anyway.

Comments

[zillah975]

I know I commented over at the fest, too, but I just wanted to drop another comment here and reiterate how awesome this is. Because it is So. Awesome.

[merry_gentry]

*blushes* Thank you so much! \o/